Playing at Knowing

Piet made a great comment to my "Saying only what I know" entry. And he's right. In fact we both know this is akin to standard Tantric practice and is usually called some variant of "Generation" or "Self-Generation". It is very powerful technique, and no wonder Piet chose it when forming the central practice of what he calls Play as Being.

I remember the lead up to the kensho. After preparatory meditation and teachings, my teacher demonstrated simple truths, ways of seeing, that were impossible to ignore but somehow, by convention, on a day-to-day basis, we do. I was left to ask the "what if"s myself. And I did. Because of had gone before, I was led to inescapable conclusions, that in turn became experiences. I felt as though I was falling ineluctably into a gravity well. And at the bottom, I saw for myself. Emptiness.

It all happened in minutes. The biggest spiritual leap in a lifetime. But why only me and not the other people in the room? And why not me before? Because of the right conditions being brought together. The right place. The right teacher. The right words she used. For me. And how many things unknown and unseen?

My Root Guru teaches many techniques. One is a visualising technique that we can use when generating Bodhichitta. It is a kind of generation practice where we transform into Buddha Shakyamuni, and he calls it Bringing the Result into the Path. It is very powerful, but when we reach the next stage of enhancing Bodhichitta using the Practice of the Four Immeasurables, he reminds us to put away our spiritual pride. If, after all, we are still on the path, we are not yet at the destination; we are not yet enlightened even though we visualised ourself to be.

So it is possible to Play, to say "what if", and to become - and to encourage others to do so. These are valuable, even indispensable, practices. But I can still see the difference between when I know and when I am playing at knowing. And if I open my mouth at that stage, I'm sure all but the most credulous can see it too! And only when I truly know with direct experience, do I feel qualified to start saying what I know, rather than playing as if I know.